In desperation she exclaimed, “I just want love! All I want is love! I want to love somebody! Is that too much to ask? Is there something wrong with that?”
I answered her frustrated questions by explaining, “There is nothing wrong with wanting love, however if you want love, you must feel love which comes from being love…” Then I asked, “How is your self esteem? Do you have low self esteem?”
She was still very emotional and almost in tears when she replied, “What is self esteem?!? When someone treats me right I have high self esteem. When I have been alone for too long I have no self esteem, it is like nobody loves me. But when my boyfriend was fighting with me and when he left me I did have low self esteem…I…I felt like a piece of shit. I just want somebody to love! What does self esteem have to do with this? My self esteem depends on how they treat me.” Her tears came flooding out with those last words.
Sadly this is the state of mind far too many people are in. They simply want to know love, to feel loved, to love forever. But they don’t know how. They don’t know why love is missing from their lives. They don’t know why they attract people who don’t love them back, or who use them and then leave them.
I used to feel that way a lot in my twenties and thirties. Even in my early forties I felt that way at times. But something happened to me in my mid forties that changed me forever. I finally built high self esteem and I became enlightened.
I have a challenge for those of you who are thinking, “What kind of ego trip is this guy on? Enlightened? Who does he think he is?” The challenge is this…for you to think that way means that you don’t believe enlightenment is really possible for us mere mortals, or that you believe it is very rare. You believe enlightenment and high self esteem must be something very difficult to come by. You have not known anyone who was enlightened or had high self esteem.
Is that correct? Do you think and believe something along those lines?
Well I am here to tell you that enlightenment and healthy self esteem are not as rare as you might think and it is not as impossible to come by as you might imagine.
They are skills that must be developed. Like an athlete who wishes to compete against other athletes it requires training and a coach. Certainly you have to do the work, but without someone who knows how to get you there, without the guidance of someone who knows the territory it is easy to get lost and confused and to come to the conclusion that enlightenment is impossible and low self esteem will be your lot in life forever.
Okay, so I digressed…My point is that once I became enlightened, once I had high self esteem, my relationship problems, loneliness and my relationship issues became a thing of the past.
Now I always have love. Now I am never lonely, not even when I am alone. Now I love being alone. And I only spend time with people who treat me good. I find it easy to walk away from situations where I am disrespected without engaging in an ego battle. I am happy whenever I want to be happy, no matter what is happening in the outside world.
I am not bragging here. I am trying to help you realize what is possible! I know many other people who have transformed their lives in just such a way as I have done. I KNOW YOU CAN DO IT TOO! YOU CAN TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE! You can be love, you can give love, and you can receive love…and you can be in love…but not until YOU change. It won’t happen because some knight in shining armor comes along and whisks you away from your troubles. Unless you change love and happiness will be like water held in the palm of your hands, it will slip through your fingers.
Hopefully you are now asking, “How can I build self esteem? What is the best way to improve self esteem? How do I become enlightened?” It doesn’t happen overnight. It takes time and practice. But once you gain these qualities, they are yours forever more.
That is why I wrote my book, Unforgettable: A Love and Spiritual Growth Story. It tells my story of going through this process. And my story of loving and losing a loved one…yet still having love. This book will answer those questions.
That is why I wrote The Ultimate Guide to Relationship Healing and made it into an audio program so you could listen to it as well as read it to learn from it. That is why I created the Relationship Healing Group so that you could get the personal coaching you need at an affordable price.
You must make an investment in your own life and in your future. At a bare minimum you must invest your time. You must seek out this better life. There are plenty of inexpensive and free resources available. However, having a relationship coach giving you personalized relationship advice, having a life coach teaching you how life really works, having someone to counsel you and guide you will certainly help your personal growth occur much much faster.
What frustrates me is how few people really want to be healthy and happy. Their lack of action speaks loud and clear. They would rather just complain about how unfair life is than to put any effort into changing themselves.
Imagine how much more amazing this world would be if each person owned their own personal power and stopped blaming their miserable lives on others. Happy people everywhere…not the just the fake smiles and temporary gratification that comes from shopping or coffee at the local coffee bar…but true inner happiness.
Truly happy people are a rare gift. I love to bask in their energy when I discover such people. What if everyone was like this? A guy can dream can’t he?
Love and Blessings,
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