Unforgettable Love Story

This is the third installment of A Beautiful Vision for Restructuring Our World, the second part is Our Power and Resources, How are We Wasting Them?

When the European Conquistadores came to the Americas, these continents contained a population of people that numbered in the tens of millions. These were people who were wealthy, cultured, and organized. They were living in harmony with nature and living happily and peacefully with one another. The Europeans came to the Americas and forcefully took what would have been given to them freely. The native aboriginal people of the American continents were generous. They were willing to share what they had and teach the Europeans how to live with nature and in a peaceful culture. The Europeans could not even see what it was they were destroying. They saw themselves as superior, when in fact they were inferior in way too many ways. It was only in their technology to do harm and kill, and their willingness to do so, that they were superior.

This abuse of power wasted a culture that in many ways is what we are seeking today. If only the Europeans would have shared their technology with the aboriginal Americans and learned the peaceful ways of those people we could be living in a world of peace today.

My point is…since there have been very large civilizations on this planet that did live in peaceful harmony, civilizations that did share and did look out for the greater good of all, then it is possible for us to change and become like they once were. Yet we can retain the lessons that corruption has brought us and keep the wisdom gained from our suffering to help us avoid ever succumbing to such a social system as we have now ever again. We can heal this planet. It worked once so it is possible and WE are the ones who can do it.

Social Systems and Organizations that Achieve Results

I have been reading about the works of the Delancey Street Foundation in reforming the worst criminals in our society. They use these criminals as teachers in what they call an each-one-teach-one system. Each person is a mentor and each is a mentee. They created their own businesses which funds the majority of their needs. They do not use government funding; however they do utilize donations from the public. They even built their own buildings using the labor of the criminals who are enrolled in their program. They have been doing this for 35 years now and are highly successful. They operate more as a family than anything else. They are a model of leadership and a working organization that can be learned from and which lends credibility to the vision I have been putting forth in this and my other blogs of this nature.

If the worst criminals in our society can do such amazing things with their limited resources, just think what we can do with the best of our society! I am certain there are many more models of functional social systems out there that we can use to architect a new society from. We just have to seek them out and learn from them and begin putting what we learn into practice.

World Transformation Radio

We are beginning a new radio talk show called World Transformation Radio where I will be interviewing guests who have been working to heal the planet. We need guests who have experience and achieved results, so if you know of someone, or you are someone like that please contact me. We also need participants that can help formulate these ideas I have presented and help flesh out the fine details necessary to begin implementing them. These talks will remain on the internet. These talks will attract other likeminded people who have the power and the will to take action. This will take time, I don’t expect these changes to happen overnight, but we must start sometime. Why not now? Will you participate?

Love and Blessings,
Michael Skowronski
Author of Unforgettable: A Love and Spiritual Growth Story
Also on Amazon.com and BarnesAndNoble.com…including awesome book reviews!

Popularity: 3% [?]

Continued from A Beautiful Vision for Re-Architecturing Our World…

The greatest power comes from people, their labor, their intellect, their skills and their love. Currently this massive amount of power is being harnessed and abused by a relatively small number of people. People with money and governmental powers are at the center of this abuse. We know that power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. So giving too much power to too few people corrupts those people. This abuse of power is an extreme waste of our power. These corrupt people consume and waste too much of our resources. Thus we must stop allowing this to happen. We must distribute the power more fairly and evenly. We must have a way of auditing those who hold the power. Ever wonder why those with power want to watch us? We should be watching them!

People often ask me which candidate I support, who will I vote for? NONE of them! No matter how good the candidates are, the system is flawed and it corrupts them once they are in office! And if they don’t become corrupt, they are powerless in their office. We need a new system. Thus I have proposed some of these ideas for a new form of government in my blog called International World Government . Certainly the fine details need to be fleshed out, but the ideas in that blog are the basis for how we need to proceed.

Power comes in the form of wealth too. If you are wealthy you have the power to choose to work or relax. You have the power to dictate the directions corporations take. You have the power to hire people to work for you and engage in whatever projects you deem worthy. Some people acquire wealth by what seems to be a stroke of luck, but we know karma is at work. Some people acquire wealth by learning skills that make them wealthy. But should these people have the power to move our society in the ways that they currently are with this wealth they poses? Does their wealth make them wise enough to do so?

I do not want to blame the problems of the world on the politicians and the wealthy. We are ALL responsible. Karma, lack of understanding and failure to face the issues have all contributed to this situation we are in…both the good and the bad. For where we have come from, given the atrocities humanity has experienced, we are doing quite well actually. But we can do better…MUCH better than this.

The real power is in the people; not the few who are abusing power, but in the many who provide the real power. We need to harness the power of the masses, but these people are for the most part tired, hopeless, unaware, undereducated, and programmed with habits that keep them enslaved. Thus we must reprogram them, we must educate them, we must make them aware, and we must fill them with hope and relieve their tiredness.

Imagine a world where our children are taught ALL of the important skills they will need in life. Not just the ones our current systems are teaching, but the ones that are so clearly lacking. Like the value of true self-esteem and how to have it, creativity and how our minds create, the true history of the world instead of the myths that control us, how to create real wealth and not an imaginary one that enslaves us, how to get along in peace, how to care for our bodies and the basics of health, the arts, and of course marketable skills that serve the basic needs of our society as well.

Imagine a world where in each job there was a mentor and one or more mentees. Imagine how nice it would be if after you learn a job well enough to teach a few others how to do it, you could move on to learn a new job skill and do a new job until once again you taught a few others how to do it and moved on again. You would have more social interactions with others, a redundancy of labor that would allow you to work less hours and have more free time, a relief from the boredom of doing the same job for way too long, and an ever growing skill set which would give you far greater options in your life.

Imagine what it would be like if these same corporations also brought in experts in essential life skills to train its employees. What if training in mental, physical, and financial health were part of the job requirement of every employee? What if goals were set, mentoring provided and results were produced in all three of these areas for every employee? Would we as a society and the corporations themselves be worse off or better off for having put efforts into these areas as well?

I believe such changes in the focus of our schools and corporate world will turn people into responsible beings who are capable of running the social systems of the world in a loving and humane way. We would be able to vote intelligently, instead of on a whim or out of fear. We would have MUCH less illness and much less of the financial losses that go with illness. We would have clear minded people who worried less, accomplished more, and had more free time to relax and enjoy life.

Imagine a world where the corporations were mostly public, non-profit corporations. Where the incredible wealth generated by the corporate world went into funding public systems, roads and transportation, true education, health care, arts and entertainment, and the needs of all people worldwide. Imagine a world were taxation of the individual was unnecessary, no tax forms to fill out, no loop holes to search for, no money taken from our paychecks.

What would motivate such a shift? Right now the wealth and resources created by the labor of the masses are going into the pockets of only a few individuals, those people who are abusing power are corrupting the directions the powerful corporations are taking to be financially focused rather than focused on serving humanity as a whole. Imagine if this were to reverse how different this world would be for everyone. People who are waking up to the power they hold would make such a shift happen.

Who will run it? We ALL will run it. EACH OF US will take a turn…or at least a far larger percentage of the population than currently does. This mentor mentee relationship will extend even to the jobs of CEOs. Our jobs will evolve from labor to planning and architecting and taking responsibility. As we each learn new skills we each will learn how it all fits together, then many more of us will be capable of running the show. There will be far more experts instead of the relative few we have today. Abuse will be much easier to spot, and far more difficult to get away with, than it is today…and there will be less of a need to abuse the system due to the great life we all will have. There will be many others ready and capable of taking over the helm when we do need to remove a person from a position of power. Committees will be at the head of corporations and governments rather than presidents, prime ministers, kings or dictators.

Imagine a world where you can actually not work if you don’t want to. Currently, the way things are, if you are poor and not working we call you a bludger or homeless or a bum. If you are wealthy and not working we call you retired or lucky or a world traveler. We are already supporting those who do not work! But that seems to be invisible to most people. We are also supporting people who work but are so emotionally unstable that they really make more work for someone else who has to come along and clean up the mess they made. If we were to reorganize how our social systems work, how our education and corporations work, and how our governments work, we could afford to care for, feed, and provide housing and health care for everyone in the world even if they do not work a day in their life.

What then would motivate a person to work? Healthy people want something useful to do with their lives. It is the stress of our modern world that causes us to want to slack off. It is the boredom of doing the same job year after year after boring year that cause us to want to take this job and shove it. People would go to work because they love it. They would feel like they were contributing to the whole. They would have an immense social network that comes from the mentor and mentee system. They would be learning new things that would motivate them to want to get up in the morning and dive into it. And they would have greater financial abundance than a person who does not work and just lives off of the system.

Where will the money come from? From these corporations. Corporate officers decide their own salary or bonuses and get them even if they run the corporation into the ground. Why do we allow that? Look at how much money is stolen from us each day through the gambling that goes on in stock market. Why is this crime seen as acceptable? People gamble with the money that runs corporations which results in a skimming of the profits into their own pockets. It causes corporations to focus on financial rewards as the goal rather than on providing quality goods and services. Foreign exchange money markets are the same. Each financial exchange results in money being skimmed off into the pocket of someone who is basically spending their valuable time and labor resources stealing our money instead of doing something productive that will benefit us all. And the banking corporations too are misleading us and cheating us. We need to establish a public banking system, one where the details and management is public record instead of private and hidden from our view, one where it is easy for anyone to audit the system.

Imagine a world where religions and their ministers were prevented from teaching hatred, judgment, doing harm to others, and bigotry. What if a religion that taught “believe our way or you would suffer some punishment in the afterlife” was required to give an equal amount of time to teaching about all of the other conflicting religions that taught the same sort of thing? What if our schools taught the basic premises of all religions worldwide without giving too much focus or attention to any one of them? What if schools taught the provable concepts common to all religions, such as the rejuvenating and clarifying effects of meditation and contemplation, such as the creative power of the mind, such as we all have the ability to hear God speaking directly to us and that we do not need some sort of mediator between God and us, such as the power of love and wishing good things for others and the self destructive effect of wishing harm or judging another?

Imagine if being held accountable and liable did not mean punishment in the way we now have it with our current justice and prison systems. What if being held accountable meant you needed some extra training and education, perhaps it might mean a restrictive or lock up living situation, but with the resources to grow and change and understand? Of course lock up would be done in a much more humane and respectful way than it is currently done. I have gone much further into this topic in my blog, Crime and Punishment…Both are Insane!

To be continued…

Love and Blessings,
Michael Skowronski
Author of Unforgettable: A Love and Spiritual Growth Story

Popularity: 3% [?]

We live in a truly great era. The world IS falling apart, and this is a great thing! Why is it great? Because the way it was structured it wasn’t working, not for most people, and now we can restructure in a way that does work for ALL people. Read this blog and you will understand what I mean.

I have been a professional software engineer for thirty years. In my business I put various tools together to solve problems in an automated way…we call this software. There has never been a problem presented to me that was suited for a computer that I could not solve. In fact in my career I solved MANY problems that I was told could not be solved with the technology that existed at the time.

I am not the only person skilled at designing solutions to solve problems; I found during my career that there are many others who also have this skill and who had very different approaches to solving the same problems. It took a lot of effort for me to let go of my attachment to how the problems got solved. As I matured I learned that working as a team and listening to the ideas of others usually resulted in better software solutions.

So please understand…even though I am presenting my vision, my ideas (actually I feel these are divinely inspired ideas so I would like to give credit to God for them), I know I don’t have all the answers and I believe that the input of other members of the team of humanity would result in a better solution.

I do relate to these efforts as exercise in re-engineering the systems of our society. Virtually any problem we face in the world today has already been solved somewhere at sometime on a small scale…these solutions are the tools that we have to work with…tools that we know work. We can replicate these solutions on a larger scale anytime we choose if we have the will to do so. I believe the ways in which our world is falling apart will increase the will to do so.

We have many tools at our disposal. The real problem is that these tools have been hacked together in shoddy way, for the benefit of a minority, and thus we have the suffering that we see in our world today. But what if we broke the relationship between the tools as they currently exist, and reconnect all of the pieces in a new way, an intelligent way, in a way that is designed to solve all of our major social and economic problems? What if we take into account all of the people on the planet this time…not just the rich and powerful? This is why the world falling apart is a very great thing. It will be much easier to convince people to re-architect our world because we can clearly see it is necessary!

So now it becomes a simple matter of deciding…

*What are the problems?
*What tools do we have?
*How do we rewrite the program?

Problems to solve, needs to fulfill (for everyone)…

*Enough Nutritious Food
*Clean Water
*Comfortable Housing
*Health Care
*Clean Renewable Energy
*Transportation
*Care for the Environment
*Education
*Violence and Corruption
*Waste of Resources
*Etc…

Tools…

*People and Their Labor, Intellect and Skills
*Social Systems and Organizations that Achieve Results
*Machines
* Animals
* Plants
* Biological Functions

To be continued..

Love and Blessings,

Michael Skowronski

Author of Unforgettable: A Love and Spiritual Growth Story

Popularity: 5% [?]

I got the following email from a friend and am answering it here in this blog…with her permission of course.

Hey Michael,

I am in a sort of internship I believe. I still have some issues of my own. Most of the abuse I have sustained was of the psychological kind and was done at the time when I was most absorbent (childhood). So… I feel that I have forgiven but that my next step is to accept that I will know this same harmful intent in others.

I think I am what is called a “sensitive”. I respond to the feelings of others…and yes, I have always said that I can feel the feelings of others. My problem is that I am not always able to determine that the feelings are not necessarily directed at me; therefore I ‘think’ they are. As a result I become angry or hurt.

In a way, that is the same as saying I feel responsible and that is not healthy.

I am NOW able to acknowledge when I feel extremely uncomfortable around others; when I sense their toxicity; their ambivalence.

Munga, you made a very good observation here. First of all it does not matter if it was directed at you or not. What matters is do you really deserve the energy being projected? Do you know? Are you clear enough to know?

Most people “think” that the words and perceived attitude of others are directed at them. This is a very standard assumption we all make. I still catch this happening in myself when my wife becomes unhappy. When she finally gets around to explaining it to me, it is due to something else. Either she is physically uncomfortable for some reason, or she is worrying about something else or somebody else in her family. Now my wife is pretty honest and owns her own stuff, but other people are not so honest, or worse don’t even understand their own minds and do not even know what it is they are thinking about. Other people may even truly believe YOU are the problem of the moment, and they project that energetically upon you or they project it quite vocally with words. So this causes most people to doubt themselves.

This is the point of work that needs to be done in many people who are sensitive and who will develop their sensitivity in the future. We need to be clear at all times about ourselves, who we are, what our intentions are, what we think and what we do. And when we do make mistakes, out of habit, and go against our true intention, we need to recognize that we have done so and take the steps necessary to reprogram our habits such that we come into alignment with our true intentions. Which I would assume is, to be loving and harmless in all of our thoughts and deeds. If that is not your intention, then guilt will surely follow you all the days of your lives!

UnforgettableBook.com

“THE BOOK IS SPECTACULAR…THOUGH I FIND MYSELF SOMETIMES LAUGHING..SOMETIMES CRYING AND OTHER TIMES I AM LAUGHING AND CRYING SIMULTANEOUSLY, OVERALL, I AM ENJOYING IT VERY MUCH…AND YOU’RE RIGHT MIKE IT IS A LOVE AND SPIRTUAL GROWTH STORY.”

– Granny Queen

Full book reviews can be found on Amazon.com and BarnesAndNoble.com

People think perfection is not possible. They say, “We are only human.” But when a person realizes that perfection is very simple then it becomes possible. I say that perfection is making it your intention to be loving and harmless in every thought, word, and deed and reprogramming your habits of thought, word and deed that go against that intention. For me making a mistake such as spilling the milk, or hitting the gas pedal when you meant to hit the breaks or some other such human mistake does not mean a person is not perfect. But to remain loving and harmless in the midst of anything that occurs, intentional or accidental, that is perfection.

When your intention is to be loving and harmless, and your habits nearly always reflect that intention, then it is easy to not take the energetic or spoken resentments and accusations of others as if you are at fault. If your intentions and actions are clear, then begin to remind yourself of this every time someone near you gets upset and you will soon find yourself at peace in these sorts of situations.

The other problem we face is we want the other person to understand us, to understand our intentions and to change how they view us and our actions. If this understanding does not come for them automatically it is not likely to come at all. We can argue with people, and try to convince them, but unfortunately even if they pretend to be convinced, in most cases they will hold on to their perceived experience and hold you responsible for whatever negative feelings they have. This may seem like a sad realization and a sad outcome, but ultimately our awakening and our clarity does lead us to increasingly better circumstances for ourselves. It really does not matter what other people think about us.

Recently, I had to get another job, for financial reasons. I have had to change jobs 3 times in the last three years. I am not someone who does this… I would like to find my niche and hang in there; my personality is such that I am loyal and tenacious. But…due to some odd circumstances, I have had to move on and continue to find work in other places. I have a lot to give to a company.

Odd circumstances, hmmm…sounds like the hands of God at work here. Didn’t you say you were in internship? Internship for what…running a corporation or healing the planet? Those who are waking up are indeed in an internship. And we are here at this moment in time to transform this planet. These shakeups we experience when we are so very close to enlightenment are those things that will shake loose those old habits of thought word and deed that no longer serve us. These shakeups give us the training necessary to understand what we are up against, and what our true job in this world is.

I found a job that looked like something I would like. With the right training, I could run this office like a well oiled machine. They hired me on the spot! I was pleased. But before the interview took place, I noticed that one of the co-workers (my equal) was very hostile towards me. Not overtly but passively. I felt terribly uncomfortable but kept telling myself not to be “paranoid”.

Be careful, be watchful, and be aware when you feel this sort of thing. Certainly the hostility is there. Not everyone wants their work environment to run like a well oiled machine. When they slack off, when they need time for themselves, it will be noticed. They will be resentful that you have taken this away from them. It is unfortunate but most companies don’t just give employees enough free time in their day to tend to their own needs. Thus we all create it and hide it in the cracks of the disorganization that exist.

I have been on the job for three weeks and the other person up and quit because she was so intimidated by my presence. This was so upsetting to me. I had done nothing to her but get hired! I am shy and reserved but friendly and kind… I know this about myself. I tried to be “nicer” to her, sensing her insecurities, but that only seemed to add fuel to the fire.

Problem is, if I am in the workplace; there is nowhere to go… there is often no choice but to hang in there. I’m sure others will say, “Quit the job” but that is not an option for me at this point. I just started!!! I kept thinking that this situation was one that I caused.

Yes, you are the cause. Your light is shinning too brightly and you give those who cower in the darkness nowhere to hide. So perhaps you should shrink back into the darkness, lie, cheat, and do a few evil deeds every once in a while so that you can be accepted. NOT! :^)

What is your job? Is it possible that in the course of your duties you may reveal something this person did that was wrong like some sort of embezzlement? Or were they frightened they would be seen as incompetent or too slow? Or is it that just having a nice person around made them sick?

I do know this…people are frightened, people are jealous, and people have low self-esteem. There are many reasons for this, but primarily and foremost is that it is NOT their intention to be loving and harmless in all of their thoughts, words, and deeds. If you dig deep enough into the reason they have low-self esteem you will find this issue is within them. For example, someone who has been abused could claim the low-self esteem is due to their abuse, but I say it is due to their desire for justice and judgment about what has been done to them and it could also be unhealed judgment of self due to their own past harmful and unloving intentions. Of course it is considered normal to want vengeance, but still it is the cause of the low self-esteem. We still have to get past our judgments if we ever expect to feel good about ourselves.

When your intention is to be loving and harmless then you know who you are and you feel good about yourself no matter what anyone says or does. This causes healthy self-esteem. It occurs over time as events occur and you witness yourself consistently responding in loving ways. Over time you receive internal guidance and you recognize your oneness with God and All That Is.

I know that is weird but you must know that women truly have different issues than men. With women, it is often about outward appearances; there is a vanity there in addition to everything else. This co-worker was morbidly obese, but then again, the three other employees (including boss) are also obese.

Certainly men and women face different issues; it is not so weird since we are biologically and socially different. A person who is generally considered physically beautiful does have to face the jealousy of those who are not generally considered physically beautiful. When the inner beauty is not there either, that jealousy comes out and can be felt.

Living in this world with other hurt people is not easy. There are no quick or fool proof solutions. I would love to be able to rise above the sickness in others, but I have a feeling that none of us is ever really healed, we just get better.

It is not easy, but it is possible…your healing can occur in spite of others who remain wounded! There are no quick solutions, but there are fool proof solutions. I just gave them above. It takes time, and it sounds to me like you are already on your way.

People are hurt, people are dysfunctional, and these are the facts of life. These wounded and dysfunctional people do seem to get in our way, they do seem to interfere with our lives, but we can change our focus and we can have peace and happiness no matter what is occurring in the outer world. I offer much advice along these lines in my other blogs such as Drowning in Worry and Reprogramming Yourself just to name a few. Over the course of our journey through life we gain much from even these experiences that challenge us.

When I realized that the co worker literally was directing HATE towards me, I tried talking to her in a tactful and gentle way. I told her I wanted us to get along and even enjoy working together. I felt good about what I said to her and felt I had done so in a loving and heartfelt way. Obviously, I should not have spoken about it to her because she merely became more resentful.

As you have found, most of the time talk does not cut it. You can’t talk your way out of being who you are. She hates you for who you are, a mirror that shows her who she is, which is a person she does not like. You are not willing and should not be willing to paint over your mirror with a pretty picture of who she is. Even your tactful and gentle talk mirrors back to her her own hatred and inability to be kind and loving.

I am not an overt, exciting person. I can’t walk in a room and uplift others by giving them extreme praise or making them feel wonderful. My personality is very calm and low key… but I smile and am friendly. This is the part I felt I had failed at. This is when, for a moment, I wished I were a different sort of person… one who could “win friends and influence people”.

To win friends and influence people by words alone or attempts to make them feel wonderful is a manipulation, it is fake and it is an energy that you do not want to engage in. When you are filled with your own sense of your true self, when your self-esteem is healthy and strong, when you are not frightened by the hatred, jealousy, and woundedness of others, when you trust life and that you ARE in the right place at the right time, you will walk into a room and uplift others by your mere presence. No words will be necessary. And those who are not uplifted will be those who are frightened by your light.

I think that I am a help to many of my friends… that they sense they are safe with me (and I with them) and we are able to help each other. But, that is not necessarily true of all relationships.

Agreed! You cannot help everyone. Not everyone will respond to you in the way you would like them to. Accept that and move on.

I wanted to be a help to my ex husband (while we were still married). (At first of course, I was very angry and showed my anger towards him). But after learning more, reading more, I tried to be loving and tolerant; knowing he suffered from alcoholism. But, to be honest, this change in me seemed to make things worse… now perhaps that is natural progression of alcoholism and nothing to do with me, but I was the one who had to eventually flee. Not for my life, but for my sanity. My already bruised ego hung perilously on the edge of a breakdown.

As we grow we must change our outer circumstances. It MUST occur and that is a good thing! We experience the pain of separation from the old, but wait…the new holds gifts for us. The new life circumstances contain many of the things we have been asking for.

I still question why my love wasn’t enough to help my ex. I still wonder why I have to “feel” the feelings of others. They only hurt for the most part.

Your love has helped, you just don’t see all the ways it has helped him yet. Your love wasn’t enough to “help” your ex because your ex has free choice. Your ex still has more to experience in the circumstances he chose for his life.

Do you have any thoughts on this? Or do you require money for your services? lol

Munga

I do not charge for my counseling services. I am especially grateful when someone allows me to be of service and allows me to post them in a blog so that others may be helped by the questions and answers.

Love and Blessings,
Michael Skowronski
Author of Unforgettable: A Love and Spiritual Growth Story
Also on Amazon.com and BarnesAndNoble.com…including awesome book reviews!

Popularity: 11% [?]

This blog was inspired while I was watching the movie Patch Adams with Robin Williams. There is a scene in the move where his girlfriend is killed because she goes to help a mental patient. The movie was based on a true story, and that particular scene reminded me so much of the real life experiences I have witnessed over and over again with folks who have been abused.

Like attracts like, but as we can see in real life, opposites attract too. Life is always striving to balance Itself out. A perpetrator needs a victim, and a victim needs a perpetrator. Are you a victim? Are you still feeling wounded from the pain you have suffered at the hands of a perpetrator? If so then I caution you to take care, take very good care. Energetically you are still a like magnet, attracting your opposite to you to work out the idea that you are a victim.

I am not saying this to be cruel. I am saying this in hopes that this advice will protect you from further harm. There is a very good book written on this topic, it is called Women Who Love Too Much by Robin Norwood. I read it many years ago and since that time have witnessed the pattern in many people who have been abused. This book would help you understand yourself and how to heal.

In the movie this woman was abused and fell in love with Patch Adams who was an amazing healer. He was bold and crazy and funny and had unorthodox methods of healing…but they worked and he was loved by many as a result. In the movie she admired Patch and his ways and one day when she was alone she listened to a phone message from a mental patient who was crying out for help. She boldly went to his house to do what she could to help him and she was killed by him. I could see how she was trying to be like Patch…but she was not. She died because she tried to do more than she was ready and capable of doing. She attracted the experience to her like a magnet.

Another interesting point about the story is that when she first met the man she felt very uncomfortable and very uneasy with him. People who have been abused are hyper sensitive to abusers. I have had dogs I got from the pound that had been abused and they were very good at sensing harmful people and barking when they came around. Much more so than dogs I had that had not been abused.

Our feelings tell us about the intentions and energy of others. Thoughts create feelings. Harmful thoughts create feelings that are uncomfortable and painful. If we tune in we can feel the feelings of others. Did you know that? It really is quite easy to do. Most people don’t realize it because we have been taught we do not have this ability, so we don’t even try. Why were you taught that? Because people with harmful intentions don’t want you to know they have harmful intentions! But if you try, you will discover just how easy it is to feel the intentions of others. People who have been abused are more aware of what abusive energy feels like, they have more experience. They can feel harmful thoughts coming and they are more aware of those feelings. But still too many of such people ignore the feelings.

If you are one of those people you might just need validation of those feelings…so that is what I am doing. I want to validate that you can indeed feel trouble coming and that you should walk away from it. Even if your mind tells you it is something you want, even if other people discount your feelings and even if there is no physical evidence to back it up. Pay attention to your feelings!

In order to heal yourself, you need to work through your thoughts and feelings about what has happened to you. You need to learn new ways of thinking and looking at yourself and other people you experience in the world. You would do well to get some help with all of this. It could be professional help, but professional does not always mean competent. It could be the really strong neighbor woman who has long ago overcome her abuse issues and demonstrates much wisdom in her life. It could be that you read heaps and heaps of books on the topic until you have explored many perspectives on the issues and thought it all through so many times that you really have noticed a dramatic change in yourself and the sorts of people you attract into your life. Do not delay. Face the fears. Work through the issues. Somehow, some way, do the body work necessary to release the built up emotion that is held in your body. Massage, Reiki, Acupuncture, Acupressure, intense physical exercise, punching a punching bag, beating pillows, and other therapies like these can help you release the emotions held in the body.

This part bears repeating…you will know when you have healed yourself when you attract totally different sorts of people in your life on a consistent basis and when you are totally repelled by harmful people. If for some unexplainable reason you continue to attract harmful perpetrators into your life you still have work to do, you will not be safe until you complete this work. You cannot change the perpetrator. Perhaps I can help them change, if they are ready, but my point of attraction is that of a healer. Patch Adams was a healer; his girlfriend was a victim who was still not healed herself. Patch Adams was helping this mentally ill man gain moments of sanity; his girlfriend was giving this man an opportunity to commit further abuse. One day you may be a healer too…one day. Do not attempt to run before you can walk.

This goes for relationships too. If you have not healed whatever dysfunction that is in you that caused a past relationship to go bad, then you will be the most attracted to those who will help you see that the dysfunction is still inside of you. If you want a really great relationship it is not going to happen until you really and truly change. You just don’t have the point of attraction for a sweet and loving relationship when you have major dysfunctional ideas about life floating around in your head.

This blog was not meant to answer your specific question about a specific problem. It is meant to help you realize the necessity of NOT sweeping personality problems under the carpet. Anybody can heal themselves. There is so much help available these days; don’t let the lack of money stop you. There are plenty of people who will help you for free (like me for example). There are plenty of books that cover just about any topic there is. There are even heaps of self-help groups of many varieties available. Seek and you will find them.

Namasté
Michael Skowronski
Author of Unforgettable: A Love and Spiritual Growth Story

Popularity: 4% [?]

This is the latest part of the story with the following installments:

Part 1 - A Marriage Made in Heaven Part I, Part II

Part 2 - The Suicide and the Accident

A side story - The Elephants of India

The Kidnapping and the Wedding

The Kidnapping

The Couple Reunite

We spent our first honeymoon night in a room at the home-stay of Madhu and Sandhya. Had I know about the abduction of my brother-in-law I would not have brought Shyni there. Years later when I questioned Shyni about it, “Why didn’t you talk me into staying somewhere else? Why didn’t you tell me Sandhya participated in kidnapping Shyam?”

She replied, “There was no other place we could have stayed. Everyone in Kumily was jealous of me. If I would have tried to take you somewhere else you would have wanted to know why. I did not want you to know about the kidnapping so soon and you trusted Sandhya. I wanted you to trust me before I began telling you how horrible these people can be. You needed to experience it for yourself first.”

I was still quite naïve about people, much more than I thought at the time. But as the story will eventually show, I did learn a lesson in life that I really needed to learn. Shyni was right to wait and let me discover this truth for myself. It did teach me to trust her more too.

Shyni was quite ill on the evening of our wedding day. She came down with a high fever. I attributed it to her not sleeping much the night before and all of the stress of the wedding. I went to the nearby restaurant owned by our Egyptian and British friends and shared a bottle of wine with them while I waited for my takeaway order to be prepared. Shyni does not drink, never has and insists that she never will, so she was happy I had someone else to celebrate with.

Due to her illness we did not consummate our marriage that evening either. Shyni remained shy about nudity and she objected when I undressed in the bedroom rather than the privacy of bathroom. I just figured it was time for her to get used to a new style of living and a new culture. I did not want to set the tone of our marriage as one of being prudish.

I hired a car and driver to take us to Munnar the next day. It was a beautiful four hour drive through the Western Ghats Mountains. These mountains rise quickly, with deep narrow valleys and another steep rise only one to two kilometers away. They contain plenty of water falls, rivers and lakes and are quite lush and green.

The journey was spectacular and magical…especially with my beautiful bride at my side. We were finally free. We sat close, held hands, looked into each other’s eyes and kissed often. This was something we could not do since the time we met, except when we were in the privacy of our bed room. And even then Shyni was holding back and reserving her affection until after the temple wedding. But now she was much more open and free with me and I was loving it!

At one point in our long drive I said to Shyni, “It’s too bad we can’t take Eju to America with us.” Eju is Shyni’s nine year old nephew, the son of her sister. He is adorable and has an energy that is very similar to ours. I love children and Eju is very easy to love because
he is so affectionate and well behaved. Shyni replied, “Do you mean that? Do you really want to take Eju to the USA?” I said, “Yes, I can see how much he loves you and how much he will miss you when I take you away.”

Shyni then proceeded to tell me how she had adopted Eju as her own son at six months of age. “I first found out about Eju when he was four months old. I came home from nursing school after my first year exams were complete. My family had not even told me that Jessie was pregnant. There was so much shame because Gopal did not want to marry her. For two months they all argued about how much dowry money Gopal’s family would accept for the marriage to take place. My father was too poor and did not have any money to offer. All that he could promise was a one third share in our family home and land. This was not enough for Gopal or his family to accept. Poor Jessie, she loved Gopal and did not want to lose him and she was facing the reality of how people in our culture would treat her as an unwed mother. Neither Jessie nor Gopal was mature enough to be parents, they were like children themselves.

“Then one night Jessie called me to come and help her. I had to ride three hours by bus to get to her house. A lot of Gopal’s family was there, a few of the men were drunk. They were all fighting over the baby and threatening to kill it. One of the men took Eju from the bed and tried to throw him to the floor. I quickly jumped up and caught Eju and ran out of the house with him. It was dark, and wet, the ground was slippery. But I ran as fast as I could down the hill and hid in the dark to see if I was being followed. I had to hold Eju’s mouth closed so they could not hear him cry.

“I watched for awhile as they came out of the house to look for me. It was too dark and it took them a little while to get organized, so I ran to a neighbor’s house and knocked on the door. They let me in and I told them what was happening. They hid us and let us sleep there overnight. I got up and took Eju home with me by bus at five in the morning.

“I had to tell my father what happened. He was very upset but not surprised. Jessie came home a few days later. I took care of Eju during that time, even when Jessie was there. I spoke with my great grandmother Ellie and asked her what I should do. She told me to follow my heart. I told her my heart said to keep Eju and raise him as my own son. My wise old great granny told me that God would support me if I was really confirmed in my decision.

“After about a week Jessie went back to Gopal and I kept Eju. A few days later my father asked me when I was going to send Eju back to his parents and I told him I was never going to send him back. We had a very long talk about it and how it was that I would take care of this baby. My father was already financially stressed and did not want another mouth to feed.

“I transferred from my nursing school, which was four hours away by bus, to a school in Kumily (which is where the family home was) and I took Eju to school with me. I told people he was my baby and his father worked a long ways away. I got a job dancing in shows for resort guests to help feed my baby and pay the bills. My father and brother Shyam played music at the resort, so they also played the music while my Uncle Cebe and me danced in the traditional Kerala style. My mother watched Eju while we performed.”

I interrupted Shyni’s story to ask, “Wasn’t it difficult to go to school, study, take care of a child and dance every evening? How could you manage?”

“Oh, I was often very tired, but I loved my life. I always wanted to be a mother so it was easy to take care of Eju. I loved being with my father and brother while they played music. It was difficult but I just did what I had to do. I could not quit school; I needed to have life out of the poverty that was too common in India. So I put up with it all. Until my father died, that is when I quit dancing and went to Delhi to work. Then my whole family needed money and Delhi was the only place I could earn good pay.”

I was blown away and my eyes were filled with tears. “Wow Shyni, I did not realize. You could have told me that Eju was your son. I can love both of you.”

“I did not know how you would take it. I wasn’t sure if you would understand. I felt I could tell you later and it would be okay.” Shyni said with a little bit of worry in her voice.

“It is okay. I love you and I am happy that we can take him to the States with us…we will be able to take him won’t we? Did you legally adopt him?”

“No. But we can do that if you like.”

“We will probably have to adopt him in order to get him a visa. Will Gopal and Jessie allow this?”

“It will take some time, but I can convince them. Eju does not want them and they don’t really want him either. Eju was so sad on our wedding day. Did you notice? He cried when we were leaving because he thought you were taking me to the USA. He did not understand what a honeymoon was, he thought Honeymoon was a place.”

I felt so happy that it was I who married this woman and not some other foreigner who might have objected. There were so many things in my life, the big things, in complex ways, that always seemed to work out in just the perfect way. I felt like this was one more sign that our marriage was divinely orchestrated and that my new wife Shyni too was moving with the divine flow of life. “Call your mother as soon we get to our resort and tell them we are going to take Eju with us.”

We stopped a couple of times along the way to enjoy the spectacular views. The rivers and valleys and waterfalls were too beautiful to pass by at a quick pace. I held Shyni close as we stood and admired the views. I felt an even deeper sense of connection with her because we were becoming a family. When I was considering taking an Indian wife, I thought it would be nice to find a widow who already had children, because I love children and because I knew a woman with a child would have a harder time finding a husband. I could not imagine taking a wife as young as twenty four like so many of the girls I had met. I did like the idea of having a younger wife, but not at the expense of immaturity. I preferred to have a mature woman even if it meant an older wife. As I held Shyni in my arms I was filled with joy and amazement at how God took so many of my desires into account when he set us up. I got a beautiful young wife who was also a mature woman and a child, this was everything I wanted. And we were getting along very well.

When we arrived at our hotel in Munnar Shyni was again not feeling very well and I needed a walk to stretch my legs after our long drive. She was already used to my routine of taking a morning and evening walk alone so she seemed to be fine with me going for a walk before it got dark. When I returned from my walk however she was not as happy. The hotel staff had questioned her about what she was doing there with me. They wanted to see our wedding certificates, which she showed to them. The man running the hotel did not seem to be impressed but the other two women on the staff began treating Shyni better. I held Shyni in my arms to comfort her and caressed her hair.

Indians have very strange ideas about life and what is appropriate and inappropriate. Actually people in all cultures have this problem, but it is much easier to see it in another culture than it is in your own. However, if you live in a couple of different cultures for a few years, it becomes easy to see the silliness of your own culture as well. I highly recommend that people go and live in a couple of different foreign countries for a few years. It would dramatically help you in your efforts to change your inner programming. If we could only take about one third of the born and raised Americans and transplant them to various third world countries for three years I bet we would see a rapid and dramatic change for the better in the entire world within a few years time. It would change the perspective of so many people who could then be effective agents for worldwide changes.

Shyni had also phoned Chechi (her mother) while I was gone. Chechi was happy to hear from us so soon on our journey. And Eju was very happy to hear about our ideas to take him to the States with us. They were also relieved that I was letting Shyni continue her communication with her family. They wondered how long it would be before they heard from Shyni.

We had a romantic dinner alone together for the first time since I have known Shyni. It was just the two of us, without family, indeed there were no other guests in the dining room at the time we were there. We talked a lot about our lives and our hopes and dreams for our future together and Shyni told me more about the troubles she had protecting Eju from harm.

“After I had been caring for Eju for two months, the president of Gopal’s community called me and she asked me to come to Gopal’s house for a meeting. When I arrived with Eju, Gopal’s cousin Sanu was there along with Gopal, Jessie and this community woman. She talked with us all and told Gopal that he had to pay some money to me for taking care of his baby. Sanu got very angry and picked up a chair, raising it over his head, to smash me with it while I was holding Eju. The community president was a big woman and she caught the chair and stopped him from hitting me. I ran for the door but Sanu caught me and began choking me to try to get me to drop Eju. I nearly passed out but I didn’t drop him so Sanu pushed me out the door. Both Eju and I fell onto the cement porch and got scratched up pretty badly. Gopal just sat there in silence; he said nothing.”

“Oh my God! What did you do?”

“I went back home and never took Eju back there again. But that is not all…Four months later Gopal’s mother and step-father came to visit us. She was being nice and wanted to hold the baby so I let her and I went to the toilet. My mother was there with them so I thought it would be okay. When I came back Gopal’s mother was gone. She had only been at the house for a very short time. I asked Chechi what had happened and she told me Eju’s grandmother gave him some biscuits and then they said they had to go. Very soon Eju started looking sick so we rushed him to the hospital.”

I was in shock. I could hardly believe what I was hearing. “Did they poison him?”

“Yes, Gopal’s mother poisoned Eju.”

“Did they pump out his stomach? Did the test it for poison?”

“Yes, we did have his stomach pumped and they did find that there was poison in the biscuits. They tried to kill him.”

I sat there for a moment with my mind reeling, How could anyone do something like that to a baby? Especially when someone else was taking care of it and not asking for anything. I was feeling mixed emotions. I was very proud that I had such a strong woman as Shyni as my wife and at the same time in shock at how sick some people could be. “Did you go to the police? Did you tell them what had happened?”

“No, we did not want any more trouble from these people. I called Gopal and told him to never come to our house again. I told him to tell the rest of his family to stay away or we would call the police.”

“Did that work, did they stay away?”

“They stayed away until Eju was nearly five. Then Gopal came by with a friend of his. Eju met Gopal at the door and called me. I asked Eju who it was and he said he didn’t know. When I came to the door Gopal had tears in his eyes. I told him I did not want his tears or his drama and sent him away.

“Many months later Gopal came back again. Jessie was staying with us at the time. He said he wanted his wife and child back. My father told me I had no legal right to keep Eju so I should send him back to his father.”

“Oh my God! What did you do?”

“I had to send him back. But I went with them. After two days I could see that Gopal was not acting like a father. He gave no love to Eju. He did not pick Eju up or play with him or hug and kiss him. And Jessie too began ignoring Eju again. So I took Eju with me and left.”

“How long was Jessie living with you at your house?”

“On and off for a year and a half. The longest she stayed with us was eight months.”

“Wow Shyni, you are a strong woman. You don’t ever have to worry about having that kind of drama with me. I will take good care of both you and Eju. Will they give us any trouble adopting him?”

“I can manage them. It will take some time. But we will get the legal papers.”

“After your father died, what did you do with Eju then? That is when you went to Delhi to work as a nurse right?”

“I couldn’t take Eju with me. It would have been too difficult. I had to learn a new language and learn my way around Delhi. I could not trust anybody in a strange city to take care of Eju while I was at work. So my mother took care of Eju while I was gone. I was making good money and saved most of it to send home to take care of the bills my father left behind and to feed my family. I took the train back home a couple of times each year to visit.”

Shyni’s story had me in tears. I was very impressed with Shyni and so thankful that I could be there to help make the rest of her life easier. We enjoyed our dinner together and then went back to our room. Shyni still had a fever and wanted to go to sleep early so we did.

I made no moves to have sex with her because she was still ill. But while we were lying in bed cuddling Shyni told me she was ready and wanted to make love so we did. It was awkward for us at first; more awkward than any other sexual experience I had in the past, but it was the start. It took many months for us to become totally comfortable with our sexual experience together. She had a lot to learn, and I learned some new things too.

Now I can honestly say that Shyni is the best sexual partner I have ever had. Although there are many reasons for this, I believe one of the biggest reasons is that we are both totally committed without any thought or desire for anyone else. That is not something I can say about my past relationships. In the past there was always a desire in the back of my mind for other sexual experiences with other women. In my younger years I thought it was natural and normal for a young man to have strong sexual urges and desire for multiple sexual partners. Now I am certain that energy tainted my past relationships and made them less than they could have been. By the time I had married Shyni too much had happened in my life, good times and painful times, things that got me ready for this woman and the commitment she had to be totally faithful to her husband. So faithful that she waited thirty years without sharing so much as a kiss with another man. I don’t mean this to be critical in any way of anybody else; I am just presenting our experience.

We thoroughly enjoyed the rest of our honeymoon together, but there were some challenges. We stayed two nights at this hotel which was higher up in the mountains than the village of Munnar. There was a lake and dam and tea plantations to explore. We stayed two more nights in the village of Munnar where Shyni was very ill and we had to call a doctor to our home-stay room to examin her and give her medication. While there we enjoyed a paddle boat ride on a river; I did all of the peddling since Shyni was not feeling well. Then we went down to a village called Kumarakom near the coast, not too far from Cochin. Shyni felt much better there because the climate was hot. Munnar was five thousand feet high and quite cold at night, and even cool during the day. We stayed three nights in a home-stay right on a canal and took a motor boat cruise of the canals while we were there. We also drove around and enjoyed all of the beautiful natural sights of the area.

Shyni stayed in touch with her family the whole time we were on our honeymoon. While we were in Kumarakom she got the disturbing news that Gopal had beat his wife Jessie. Because of that, and because I wanted to get back to work writing my book Unforgettable: A Love and Spiritual Growth Story, we cut our honeymoon short by a few days. We had one more costal city we were going to visit but decided to return to Kumily instead.

Karma Changes People

Because I have reported some pretty horrible things about Shyni’s relatives in this story I wish to balance it out by saying something else about these people. It is nearly three years later and during this time Life has had quite an impact on them. Jessie and Gopal have stayed with us for many days and nights on many occasions. We did legally adopt Eju and their second child Geethu has also come under our care. Geethu wants us to adopt her too and Jessie and Gopal have consented. Jessie is not without fault in their fights; indeed she has a very big mouth, can be quite mean, and does not know when to shut up. She talks constantly, and I do mean constantly. Once my brother pulled the circuit breaker in our house so Jessie would think we had a power outage and go to sleep. It worked and she stopped talking.

Jessie and Gopal are getting along a lot better now as a result of so many things, including the influence that Shyni and I have had on them. Shyni’s mother Chechi is taking care of the kids since we have no visa’s for them yet. Jessie and Gopal are helping out and have become very responsible. The kids deny that Jessie and Gopal are their parents, treats them like servants, insults them any time they screw up, and tries to show them the correct way to care for children. Otherwise both kids are strong loving and competent beings. Eju has won a few singing competitions and at age twelve has become quite the entrepreneur starting a few of his own side businesses. Geethu has been the top student of her class in both kindergarten and first grades. I keep telling Shyni to talk to the kids about respecting their birth parents, but we don’t have that much control from here. I don’t speak their language yet and the kid’s English is not real good either. So Jessie and Gopal are being given some very hard lessons and they are changing.

The second husband of Gopal’s mother died recently and her stepchildren kicked her out of her husband’s home. This is the woman who poisoned Eju as a baby. Gopal’s father, which is her first husband, lives with Jessie and Gopal and will not have her back. So Gopal can’t care for his own mother who faces being homeless. She is not homeless however, because she is now living with Shyni’s mother Chechi, Eju and Geethu. Eju is loving his grandmother who tried to kill him early in his life. She has to live with what she did on a daily basis. Her vial deeds were returned with love.

It is funny how Eju’s life and existence has influenced these people who were so desperate for money when he was born and so ready to kill him because they thought he would be a burden in their lives. When Eju was two years old he played Tabla with his grandfather at the Spice Village Resort and earned Rs. 100 for his performance, a day’s wage for an Indian man. Just the other day the family needed food yet Chechi and Gopal both were out of money. We normally give them money but the ATM card they were using was stolen and the new one has not yet arrived. So twelve year old Eju told Chechi that he would go and do some work so they could eat. He went out and returned only a couple of hours later with Rs. 600 (for installing a home theater); this is a week’s wage for an Indian man. They all ate that evening and for many more days because of the baby they wanted to kill. Life has its ways of teaching us what we need to learn.

Stay tuned for the next installment – Stranded in India

Love and Blessings,
Michael Skowronski
Author of Unforgettable: A Love and Spiritual Growth Story

P.S. If you like this story and my other blogs then you will love my book. Please help us out by reading Unforgettable and telling your friends about it. You can purchase an autographed copy directly from my website or you can also find it on Amazon.com as well as BarnesAndNoble.com.

Popularity: 9% [?]

I would ask those of you who have seen the Golden Compass and liked it to read this blog since you are the audience I especially want to reach. I am sure that you have a heart, would like to see a world in peace, and would like to see a world absent of suffering due to poverty and corrupt governments.

This movie had a lot of controversy. Primarily it seemed to be Christians who objected to it due to some sort of satanic influence of demons and witchcraft and psychic phenomenon. Perhaps there were other objections, even those along the lines I will shortly state, but on MySpace they were drowned out by the Christians and anti-Christians bashing each other over conflicting philosophies.

I saw the preview online and was immediately turned off by the violence of the film. I decided against seeing it. But I continued to read comments posted about the film, some of which were by my friends on MySpace in favor of the film. So I decided that I should have an open mind, see the film in its entirety and then come to my own conclusions.

I thoroughly enjoyed the first half of the Golden Compass. I loved the idea of an alternative world where every human has an empathetic animal, which the writers of the film called “demons”. I expect if they were called “angels” there would have been far less Christians objections. It is sad really, that people can’t get past their labels and form their opinions based on the true nature of that which is being labeled because these demons were more like angels than demons. They reflected the state of mind and feeling of the human and vice versa. If the human suffered from a wound or was killed so did the demons suffer the same fate. If the demons were hurt in anyway the human suffered in the same way. People in our reality have become far too numb to their own suffering. Having such a demon might just be a good way for them to notice how much they really are suffering and prompt them to do something about changing it. We’ve learned to ignore our feelings too well.

It was the violence in this film that causes me to call The Golden Compass “a waste of mind.” All of the wonderful creativity of this alternative world was used to suck us into yet another violent film. Now I do understand that this world does indeed contain violence. To reflect it properly, there must be some level of it in our art, including films. But that is not what happens in films like this. What is happening is people who consider themselves good and righteous and loving and caring, consider this to be good violence. The bad guys are getting what they deserve. It is portrayed as the good fight. This “good fight” makes up far too much of the theme of the film and the alternative ways of changing the world are not even presented.

These types of films do great harm to the minds of the masses of the people in the world. They create in us a certain level of acceptability of the idea that violence is an effective tool for change in the world, when it is not that at all. To end violence, we must end violence. Period. We cannot end violence by using violence to do it. We cannot end corruption by enthusiastically engaging in the corruption of the film industry either. The hour and a half we spend watching such a film digs deep ruts in our minds which cause us to accept this idea and causes us to continue to act in violent ways to what we perceive as the villains in our lives. It causes us to believe in an us vs. them sort of perspective on life. There is no us and there is no them…we are all One!

Now I know there are plenty of people who are reading this and rolling their eyes, and it is you I wish to address here with these questions… What do you really know and understand about life? How much do you pay attention to the events that occur in your life and the thoughts you think? Do you own the negative events that are occurring in your life or do you blame them on someone or something else? How capable of loving others are you? How needy are you? What kind of impact do you have on others, is it positive or negative?

I have been paying attention to life and have come to understand it very well, especially the relationship between our thoughts and how it affects both our own inner experience and the events in the outer world. I know for a fact that we cannot create peace while focusing on violence and war. Watching such films is a focus on war. It carries over beyond the time span of the film. It enters our conversations with others. It forms our beliefs and opinions about life. And these thoughts do create the reality we live in. To continue to accept such films in our lives is to continue to accept war in our lives. We must reject them and encourage others to reject them too. I am NOT talking about legal bans on such films, I am talking about recognizing what they are doing to us and choosing to NOT watch them.

I would like to present the following as a concrete real life example of what I am writing about. I had a friend who responded to my blog titled Crime and Punishment…Both are Insane! She complained that her son was murdered and that she wished she had requested the death sentence for the perpetrators of the crime, as if that would have made up for the bullshit she went through with the court system and for the pain and suffering she felt at the loss of her son. When I looked at her profile I found out that her favorite TV programs, books and movies were about crime and punishment, they were murder mysteries. Here is an obvious point of attraction to the life she is living. I am not trying to say that everyone who engages in such entertainments will have murder enter their lives, but I am saying the suffering she is going through is exaggerated and prolonged by such entertainments. And this woman is quite ready to prolong the suffering of humanity by insisting that those who really need mental help receive abusive punishment instead. How is this different than the retaliation so common amongst terrorists?

We need to create and expand the market for a totally different kind of film. We need to ask for films that enlighten and empower us. We need to be inspired, uplifted, and educated by the entertainments we give our time and money to. We need to actively promote movies and other forms of art that take our thoughts in the direction we say we want our lives to go.

I am presenting here a very large list of films that you can rent on DVD that will inspire and uplift you. If you have not already developed a taste for such films, I encourage you to do so. For some this may be a difficult thing to do, since you like the feeling of the bad guy getting his ass kicked and have become addicted to films such as the Golden Compass. But I assure you that you can develop a new taste in movies and that it would greatly improve the quality of your life to do so. These are the sorts of films that will cause you to think differently and come up with creative ideas that can rid this planet of man’s inhumanity towards man.

The “Planet Earth” series and other nature documentaries can fill your mind with beauty and start you thinking about how amazing life really is.

“Amazing Grace” is a true story of how a British MP (Member of Parliament) was able to outlaw the slave trade. Some disturbing scenes are in it, but overall it is hopeful and shows what a few dedicated people can do, and also shows that big changes take time and persistence.

“The Ultimate Gift” an EXCELENT story of a spoilt rich young man who is transformed by the death of grandfather and the “gift” he left behind.

“Powder” although it is not a true story, in many ways it does show the kind of thinking and power that a person can attain to. Many masters had the sort of insight and compassion this boy had and even had their own amazing miracles…the miracles in “Powder” are a bit contrived however and some of them are useless.

“Michael” with John Trivolta. “Danny Deckchair” very funny, a good taste of Australia, romance. “Radio” a true story that is inspiring. “The Future We Will Create: Inside the World of TED” very inspiring! And check out the videos on TED.com…AWESOME! “First Do No Harm” inspiring true story of overcoming epilepsy. “The Elegant Universe” documentary series. “I am Sam” touching film about a retarded man raising a daughter. “Gandhi” very inspiring what a man on a mission can do. “The Color Purple” a woman overcomes being suppressed and mistreated by abusive husband. “End of the Spear” & “Beyond the Gates of Splendor” about the Waodani tribe of South America and how they overcame their violent nature. “The Simple Life of Noah Dearborn” inspiring story about a wise black man. “The Notebook” touching story of elderly care. “I Am David” inspiring story of the courage a young boy faces in war torn Europe. “The Brooke Ellison Story” true story of paraplegic girl who graduate summa cum laude from Harvard University (produced or directed by Christopher Reeve). “Emmanuel’s Gift” (produced by Oprah) a true story about a very powerful young disabled African man who transformed his nation’s ideas and government policies about the disabled. “Coach Carter” (a true story I believe) about a great teacher and basketball coach who transforms his students.

“Remember the Titans”, “Something the Lord Made”, “Just Like Heaven”, “Love’s Enduring Promise”, “1 Giant Leap”, “Life of Buddha”, “Experiencing the Soul: Before Birth, During Life, After Death”, “Indigo”, “Dalai Lama: The Soul of Tibet”, “Bend It Like Beckham”, “The War”, “Shall We Dance?”, “The Man in the Moon”, “Something’s Gotta Give”, “Philadelphia”, “Mona Lisa Smile”, “Steel Magnolias”, “Terms of Endearment”, “The Evening Star”, “The Other Sister”, “Origins: Nova”, “Unfolding Universe”, “World Almanac Video: The Expanding Universe”, “Magnetic Storm: Nova”, “If We Had No Moon”, “Marvin’s Room”, “Practical Magic”, “Little John”, “Fly Away Home”, “My Girl” 1&2, “Conversations with God”, “The Celestine Prophecy”, “As Good as It Gets”, “Places in the Heart”, “The Painted Veil”, “Smile”, “Shine”, “Ocean Oasis: IMAX”, “Sarafina!”, “The Associate”, “The Long Walk Home”, “A Walk in the Clouds”, “Mrs. Palfrey at the Claremont”, “Chocolat”, “Dreamer: Inspired by a True Story”, “Flicka”, “Freedom Writers”, “Mrs. Henderson Presents”, “Boys on the Side”, “The Prize Winner of Defiance, Ohio”, “The Gods Must Be Crazy” 1&2, “Driving Miss Daisy”, “Holy Man”, “Corrina, Corrina”, “The Mighty”, “Groundhog Day”, “There’s Something About Mary”, “Shiloh”, “Mandela and de Klerk”, “Raise Your Voice”, “Touching Wild Horses”, “Skipped Parts”, “A Walk to Remember”, “Joshua”, “Uptown Girls”, “Love Comes Softly”, “Sacred Planet”, “Mickey”.

These are just a few of the films I recommend. I took the list from movies I have rented from NetFlix. Certainly there have been many other such films I have watched prior to getting my NetFlix account. I would love to have a recommendation from you my readers for other films along the same lines as these.

Love and Blessings,
Michael Skowronski
Author of Unforgettable: A Love and Spiritual Growth Story
Also on Amazon.com and BarnesAndNoble.com…including awesome book reviews!

Popularity: 4% [?]

Ahhh romance that elusive experience that comes and goes. When we have it we think it will last forever, when we dont we worry that it will never come again. It is an experience that so many crave yet have had so little of in their lives.

True romance feels good. It should not frighten you. If it does not feel good to you then you are confusing romance with all the bad things that happens in dysfunctional relationships.

Do you remember how good it feels when you begin falling in love with someone? The intensity of these good feelings come from our connection with our Source, from many spiritual beings, including our own Inner Being, radiating their enthusiasm and excitement that we have found our hearts desire. This is why they are so powerful.

Good feelings always result from being in alignment with the whole of our being and what we have been asking for. If you already have romance in your life, whether it is a new relationship or one that you have had for a while, you are in a very good place. Your dominant vibration is one of great happiness, great joy and great passion.

That means you have an incredible connection with your source. You should understand that this is responsible for many of the other wonderful things that are falling into place in your life right now.

If you dont have romance in your life, but you want it, then you are going to have to bring yourself to that place. You are going to have to romance yourself. You are going to have to treat yourself wonderfully and give yourself love and nurturing and caring and bring yourself into a place of great joy and passion for life.

Who wants to be around a sourpuss? No one. Who wants to be around someone with misery in their life? Very few people want that. If they do want that in their life, do you want them in yours?

So you have to take care of yourself. Look after yourself. Nurture and love yourself, take yourself out to dinner. Buy yourself wonderful things. Look in the mirror and flirt with yourself. Challenge the negative messages others have given you. Find things within you that contradict those negative messages. You need to feel loveable for someone to want to love you and for you to let it in.

If you are in a relationship now and it does not have the romance elements in it that you want or you want more from it, then you are the one who is going to have to create that. You are going to have to make yourself more available for that. You are going to have to treat yourself better so that you are in a better feeling place so that you are more attractive to your partner. And if this does not re-kindle the fire in the heart of your partner it will repel them and attract one that is better suited to who you are now.

Romance is about relationships and getting to know another person. It is about the discovery of your own beauty through the eyes of an attentive other.

Part of what makes it feel good, of what keeps you open to receiving, is your recognition of qualities that you appreciate in this other person. It is your focus on the beauty you find in them.

What makes Romance go bad? When does it stop feeling good and start feeling bad? When you discover and focus on things you do not like in this other person. These bad feelings are an indication that you are focused on something that you do not want. They are an indication that you are pinching off your connection with your life giving, energizing, All Knowing and All Seeing Source.

Does pinching off your Source sound like something you want to do? It is not because you or they have done something bad that you are cut off from your Source. It is your focus on what you do not want the cuts you off from your Source.

This article is NOT intended to address how to deal with the dramatically abusive things that happen in some relationships. If you need that kind of help then please seek appropriate counseling, you can even ask me for help I offer it for free. The concepts addressed here will help, but you will also need help understanding how so many of the ideas that you hold about life keep you from the happiness you seek.

Most relationships suffer from a break down in focus way before any of the more serious problems occur. One event at a time each person notices something they dont like in their partner. Then they focus on it and make it a little bigger.

When you worry about something your partner did or does, and you tell others about how annoying it is, you are focusing your attention on it and you are shifting your vibration so that it matches those same unwanted behaviors. You are actually turning yourself into a magnet for more such experiences.

Not only that but if you are telling others about it you are probably setting up resentments in them towards your partner. So now there are two people holding negative energy towards your partner. Your friend may even begin to distance themselves from you because of the negative energy they perceive that you are making them feel.

Can you see how this would affect you? Can you see how this is not romantic energy you will be feeling, or even open to feeling if you are holding such thoughts in your mind? Can you see how this would affect your partner?

We all respond to our feelings and the feelings we pick up from others much more than we consciously realize. These feelings push and pull us, most dont know why they go where they do, but yet they do go. Your work is to become conscious of the energies at play in your life and romantic relationships give you plenty of chances to generate the widest variety of feelings.

Negativity that you feel towards your partner will be noticed. Most people are not aware enough to turn away from this negativity so you are likely to arouse similar negativities within them or push them away from you if they do not wish to engage in them.

If your partner did something you did not like, of course you will feel bad. But the solution, the answer to the desire that is born from that event, comes from focusing on what you do desire. You dont do battle with the problem, you turn away from it and walk towards what you do want.

One day I was in my girlfriends kitchen preparing a meal (well call her Shelia). I put a skillet on the burner and turned it onto high to preheat it.

Shelia came in and upon seeing the skillet being heated with nothing in it became angry. “You’re going to ruin my pans! Dont do that!” She snapped as she turned the heat off.

I was in a particularly clear space at that point in time and I decided to try turning her anger into love. I focused on many things about her that I loved and appreciated. I focused on some of the nice vacations we had taken together and on the feelings of making love with her.

I said nothing in my defense nor did anything else. Shelia said a few more derogatory words and then left the room. When the meal was ready I went to get her. She then blasted me with a few choice things from our past.

Here is where so many relationships go wrong. As you can see Sheila was still holding on to past issues. There is this accumulation process that most people do when something hurts them, they hang on to it and when other painful events occur at later times those old hurts also come to the foreground and receive focus. Even though I know how destructive this can be, I still catch myself doing it.

Sheila was focusing on what she did not want, not on what she did want. There was only one bad thing that happened yet she multiplied it into at least five other things. Thus increasing the intensity of her bad experience.

What affect would Sheilas actions have had on you? I could feel it draw a very defensive and negative energy out of me. This is a great example of the creation process in action.

I was determined to keep my good feeling state of mind. I reached for better feeling thoughts about Sheila. I realized that she was already annoyed at the kangaroos that were eating the new grass she had just planted. (Of course this happened in Australia.) I knew of other things that had gone bad for her that day too. So I could understand how she got so angry when she discovered the empty skillet I was overheating. These thoughts gave me compassion for her.

In my mind I reminded myself, I am a good partner. I treat her well. I am only trying to make lunch for us both. I have done nothing wrong. All of these thoughts helped me to feel better about myself and remain centered.

Rather than defend myself I said to Sheila, “These things have no bearing on this incident. In fact we have already sorted them out. Please, lets go and enjoy a nice meal together.”

I continued to hold the thoughts of good times with Shelia. It was not even an hour later that the whole energy between us changed. We had a very nice and romantic connection for the rest of the day. Things like this used to cause us many hours or even days of disconnection. I am certain that the shift I made in my energy made the difference in this case.

So often people think that the romance in their life is due to the things they do. I know it is easy to believe this. However, if your actions are not in alignment with your thoughts and feelings then you are only wasting your energy and cutting yourself off from your Source.

There are many books that teach you how to re-kindle the love you once knew. They are full of great techniques and ideas. These are very helpful, but the actions you take must be inspired actions; inspired by the love and appreciation you have for your partner. So keep seeking out those things to admire and appreciate in your partner and in yourself.

Love and Blessings,
Michael Skowronski
Author of Unforgettable: A Love and Spiritual Growth Story
Also on Amazon.com and BarnesAndNoble.com…including awesome book reviews!

Popularity: 6% [?]

*Enlightenment Inc. – Hires employees and teaches them skills for enlightenment as part of their work duties.

*Teach the Children – Free worldwide education with the best possible and enlightening resources.

*Harmonious Living Arts and Entertainment – Entertainment that inspires and enlightens.

*Guidance towards Sanity – Anti-criminal justice including an end to the war on drugs. Focuses on reform rather than punishment.

*International World Government – Using the Internet to make the governments of the world accessible by the average person.

Changing the World…

We all want to see it happen, but not all of us for the same reasons nor in the same direction. But when it comes down to it, we all want the world to be a better place to live, at least for ourselves.

Changing others is a difficult task. Other people must want to change. We tried forcing change, we tried locking people up in prison in hopes that it would change them. We tried condemning others to hell for their behaviors in hopes that it would change them. But has it worked? I say that people are changing in spite of these two failed approaches. If you don’t believe those two options have failed and proven to be impossible then wake up! Look at the data that is readily available. One of the biggest problems we face is that we have a system of government that caters to the fears of the general population and does not evaluate whether the actions we are taking are effective or not. The governments of the world simply ignore truth. Too many people ignore truth. This must change!

The most effective form of change has occurred as a result of attraction. We see that 12 steps programs, such as Alcoholics Anonymous and it’s offshoots, are solving the problems with addiction through the efforts of recovering addicts helping each other. By and large this is a program of attraction not promotion. People participate because they are attracted to those who have faced similar challenges and are living a much better life free of their addictive activities.

We see a spiritual movement that is surpassing the religious movements of the past. People are attracted to the light being spread by wise and compassionate people who have discovered real spiritual power within themselves. It shines brightly in certain people and others are attracted to them and what they teach. Yet there are no positions of superiority, only leaders who are showing others the light that is within their own being.

Lately we have been hearing a lot about a Universal Spiritual Law known as The Law of Attraction. This law states that we create our reality, both our inner reality and our outer world experience, through the focus of our minds. We attract to ourselves life experiences based upon the vibrations we hold, which are based upon the thoughts we think. I have proven to my own satisfaction that the The Law of Attraction is indeed at work in our lives. And many other people have done the same!

Brainwashing has been the traditional way that we have influenced the course of our society. And I do not see this influence going away anytime soon. Radio, TV, Movies, Newspapers, Magazines, and most recently variations on these mediums are online. School systems, government, military, corporations and religion also have played a role in the brainwashing of the masses. We must do this too!

In order to be effective in creating a positive change we must become involved in all of these mediums of brainwashing. It will take a large number of likeminded individuals to do this working together as a team. These changes are going to take money too. Unfortunately a lot of our money is tied up in taxes, taxes that are being wasted by corrupt and ineffective governments. It going to take a lot of promoting so that those of like mind will find us.

World Solutions Database and International World Government

I have already written a blog called International World Government on the basic concepts of this government. Some have responded to this in shock and horror. It seems like they are reacting to the title alone without reading the details. This is not a one person rules the world type of government that I am suggesting.

We need a common place that all people all over the world can go to register the problems this world is facing and begin the topics for discussion. Notice that I did not name it “World Problem Database”. The focus is on the SOLUTIONS not the problems. We must however register the problem, in order to begin discussing the solutions. And the solutions implemented should produce measurable results that take us towards our goals.

The goals of this government should be to provide the basic needs of all people everywhere on the planet. This includes nutritious food, clean water, clothing, housing, education, child care, energy, public transportation, a clean environment, humane treatment of animals, protection from harm and free medical care.

Continued in my blog  Enlightenment Incorporated

Namasté
Michael Skowronski
Author of Unforgettable: A Love and Spiritual Growth Story

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Lately I have been reading mail coming from caregivers who are falling down on the job. The pain and suffering they have to deal with is overwhelming them. They find themselves taking on the pains of others and depression and deep sadness is the result. This also applies to parents who are overwhelmed with supporting the family and caring for their own children.

It is of the utmost importance to take care of yourself number one. YOU MUST BE YOUR OWN TOP PRIORITY!

I cannot stress this point highly enough. If you do not take care of yourself then you have very little to offer to another person that will be of real value. This is because the energy coming from you is harmful. Especially to one who is extra sensitive due to some physical or mental illness. And children too react to your suffering and worry. The following are links to blogs that will help you take care of yourself in your role as a caregiver…

Being a Caregiver
Reprogramming Yourself
Meditation and the Wandering Mind…Meditation is especially important for a caregiver!

Have you ever wondered how I came to understand the relationship between our thoughts and our energy so well?

It comes from experience, much experience. The following excerpts are taken from my book Unforgettable: A Love and Spiritual Growth Story. Kathryn was my late wife who was dying of cancer at the time the “Lessons In Energy” story takes place. She was very intuitive, a gifted psychic and a Reiki Master. She was a powerful healer for others and taught me a lot about energy and how it works through the following sorts of experiences…

Our First Reiki Experiences

I did not feel much when I gave a Reiki treatment. Occasionally I would pick up information about the people I was working on, but my head kept questioning the validity of what I was feeling. One time when Kathryn was having back pains she asked me for some help. I was happy to be able to help and almost surprised that she believed that I could. She sat in a dining room chair, leaned forward and asked me to do Reiki on her back. In my mind I prayed, Please Holy Spirit move through me to help Kathryn in the best way possible.

After a short while she said, “Oh Mike, that feels great; it’s just what I needed. You have such good healing energy.”

I believed Kathryn could really feel the energy so I was excited to hear that coming from her. Without saying anything, I did not move a muscle; I only thought to myself, Wow, I am doing this. It is actually working. I might just turn out to be a healer after all. I felt thrilled and excited; I was even more enthusiastic to continue treating Kathryn, until….

At the very same moment I was having those thoughts, Kathryn responded, “That’s not it, it’s changed. The energy feels bad now.”

I immediately recognized how I let my ego get in the way. I prayed quietly, Okay Holy Spirit, I’m sorry, I’ll get out of the way and allow you to move the energy as you see fit. I am only an instrument of your healing.

Once again, at the very same moment I began having those new thoughts, Kathryn responded with, “That’s better…It’s back.” Not only was I amazed that I was actually changing my energy with each thought, but that Kathryn really could pick it up. This experience made a profound impression on my mind.

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